He thinks that I'm a cabbage
'Cause Kevin he's in love with himself
Got the Human League into advise her
What I like to do, he doesn't
Girls try to attract his attention
Now he's making lots of noise
Always spotless, clean and neat
He's sure to go to heaven
Now I've got a cousin called Kevin
He's got a degree in economics
He's his family's private joy
But what a shame, it's in vain total rejection
He's his family's private joy
Oh my perfect cousin
That me and Kevin were just not the same
The smoothest you can get them
Maths, physics and bionics
My ma said they cost a packet
Oh my perfect cousin
Even at the age of ten
He's got a fur lined sheepskin jacket
Cause he flicked the kick and I didn't know
He's his family's private joy
His mother's little golden boy
What I like to do, he doesn't
Songwriters: Michael Bradley, William Doherty, John O'Neill, Stephen O'Neill, Feargal Sharkey
His mother bought him a synthesizer
Playing along with the Art school boys
She won't even let me explain
Smart boy Kevin was a smart boy then
He always beat me at Subbuteo
'Cause I hate University Challenge
Oh my perfect cousin
Publisher: WEST BANK SONGS LTD
He will never be left on the shelf
His mother's little golden boy
His mother's little golden boy
What I like to do, he doesn't