Bio

Hometown:	NYC is my home. I hope to actually live there some day!
School:	ask Alice Cooper
Employer:	play in an indie honkey-ton k Polish polka blue-grass band! (j.k. no i don't

For a living, I sit in a cube wearing ugly blue button-down clothes and create soul-sucking, redundant bureaucratic forms for people in banks to waste *their* life for no reason. While i do this, I listen to things like Bauhaus daring me to "be real" and to reject bureaucracy.

Here is an immitation-Voltaire song i wrote for my Pandora buddy Warpig. i call it 'career advancement'.

oh..... *slow violins*
my co-workers tod-ah-ay...
need to be shot!
*3 acoustic guitaur chords!*

shot in the head!
*chord-chord-chord*
shot in their bed!
*chord-chord-chord*
shot with a gun!
*chord!*
shot for fun!
*chord!*
fun! fun! fun!

*violins*

(chorus:)
one day when it's rai-ahy-ny
*slow viola*
i'm gonna do my best Che-ehy-eny
*slow viola* *castanet!*

take a grenade
and hold it at bay
DON'T count to 3
cuz i have to say:

*fast violins*
my co-workers got to be fragged
their bodies have got to be bagged
their asses have got to be *loud castanets and tubas*

(chorus)

*the Voltaire-style twist coming up!*
*slow violins*
cuz when you're in the army
shooting soldiers...
is just the thing to do!
and it's how... I got...
a medal or two!
(demonic whisper: uncle sam needs YOU!)
*acoustic chords!*

(chorus 2 times)

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"Hysterical! Maniacal! Voltaire would be proud!" -- Goth-Ann
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"Your song is more magical than a My Little Pony! I love it!" -- Peter Pumpernickel
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now all i gotta do is learn to sing and play a musical instrument... ah well. there's always karaoke.

more lyrics on my Squirrel, Rasputina, Sabbath, Over-flow, CradleOfFilth, R.Clooney station descriptions.

I'm just a loser stuck in a cube, but I had drinks with Voltaire and other fans in NYC, and got pictures to prove it!

before this, i wrote an immitation-Vonnegut novel, Mother Mars by Corwyn Green, available on amazon.com. sold 6 copies. even been read once!

yes, i know not to quit my day job