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Mike D

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I once drew a perfect circle on an ethc-a-sketch that had a half-broken right knob using only my elbows while hanging upsidown with my hands tied behind my back in complete darkness, blindfolded with Larry the cable guys dook streaked underwear, gagged with a child molesters dirty sock, frying up some chicken and biscuits, completely under water, soaked in gasoline and on fire, being electrocuted in my scrotum, while pop-country music was playing to try to distract me and a swarm of ants and bees were all up in my s**t all at once, simultaneously, in a row, one after the other, in echelon, back to back in the middle of an active civil war reenactment battlefield. I got shot by 4 musket balls, 3 miniballs, 2 grape-shot, and a racist confederate duck shot out of a cannon. And I had to take a dump the whole freakin time. Then, as I gazed pridefully at the perfect circle in all of its glory, I moved it to fast and it got erased before I could show anybody. ---That damn pop country music was almost too much.

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