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ill

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obsession begins with tori amos and leaks out into realms of red hot chili peppers, nirvana, chevelle, system of a down, revis, weezer, the killers, tom petty, cake, spoon, stevie ray vaughan, jimi hendrix... and still there's so much more. oh, so much more. "if you could only see" by tonic is so lushly emotional, i cannot uproot the words that would do its beauty any justice. toadies can f**k my ears anytime, again and again and again. the music-blood is always on the edge of a blade, aching to move, filling the limbs with an urgent need. leaving, coming, creeping--all over me. i love jewel's poetry; not her music. the old goo goo dolls, i could swallow up and feel satisfied--but i hate new goo goo dolls and their sappy drab mainstream barf. the fresh throb of new, live tunes plucked in grungy coffee shops, stirred by undiscovered voices under the burlap ceilings makes me giddy. chocolate, beer, playing the guitar, tall shiny spike-heeled boots, bad stupid boring chick flicks and weird dramas, swearing, potato chips, tequila, trying to make people laugh, missing my mama, belly dancing, dirty dancing, silly dancing, any dancing(!), singing, writing crappy poetry and calling it song-fodder, jack daniels, seagrams 7, first- and second-hand shopping, champagne, sexy underwear, comfy sweats, love, lust, and trusting myself. (just a few things i will not give up.)

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