Cradle Of Filth Radio

Edit your station name:

sick black metal station of bands i'm thinking of seeing live soon

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totally unrelaed, yet another "song" i wrote. (lyrics plagiarized whole from Warpig and Joshua Luman joking around, who were in turn inspired by my 'soul-sucking' cubicle job, so it's all fair)

(to be performed in the style of a high school marchng band, with a firm Rat-t-Tat-t on the drums and a simple, loud brass horn or two!)

<^> == one beat pause


Soul Sucking Academy

(chorus)
Come get your training and degree
not from Hogwarts or MIT
but Soul Sucking Ah! cah! dah! me!

With top-rate classes taught by me,
Stalin, Bush and Brittany, <^>
you will quickly learn to be <^>
more evil than the DMV!
(if the lessons you well recall,
you will have minions to enthrall,
An infernal profession-ol!)
from Soul Sucking Academy!

we are in our <^> vocation
to compete with <^> salvation
a global organ-eye-zation
with conveni-ent locations
(in mySpace and Siberia,
sororities, Somalia
a goth club called Ulteria )
and your local cable stations!

(chorus)
So get your training and degree
not from Hogwarts or MIT
but Soul Sucking Ah! cah! dah! me!

here you always show up to class
or your training you'll never pass
the classes are hands-on, you a-ss!
(if you lose yours in the process
don't despair, just take your bosses'!
Fridays parties are soul tosses!)
So suck that soul from that sweet lass!

The benefits are really swell
'sides the stories you get to tell
in a dark tower you will dwell
(with a wide air conditioned view
of the lake-of-fire's hot brew...
in there... that Blink 182?)
We'll even halve your stay in hell!

(spoken: "psst! What's eternity divided by two!")

(chorus)
Go get your training and degree
not from Hogwarts or MIT
but Soul Sucking Ah! cah! dah! me!



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COMING SOON to a Cradle of Filth station near me: the Black Sabbath NIB karaoke version of this song!

eeyup, i'll take the 8-beat thing, make it 10-beat by adding some 2-sylable crap like "yee-haw!" or "e'gads" to it (i'm kidding... or am i?) take out some lyrics.... and sing it to Sabbath's NIB in karaoke!

black sabbath karaoke rules... cuz Ozzy just sings the same few notes repeatedly, and he does this in tune with the guitars without trying any fancy musical stuff like "harmony".

lets see how many times can i re-write Iron Man lyrics...